Cricket explained by Wisden to all stupid Americans

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that’s in the side that’s in goes out, and when he’s out he comes in and the next man goes in until he’s out. When they are all out, the side that’s out comes in and the side thats been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out. When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who stay all out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!

See so simple

Magic Slate – Only for Urdu reader

Check out this MAGIC SLATE

Afridi to skip Test Matches until World Cup

 Pakistan all-rounder Shahid Afridi has decided to stop playing Test cricket until after next year’s World Cup in the West Indies.

 

“I have decided that it is better if I stop playing Test cricket until the next World Cup and concentrate on giving my best for the team in the one-dayers” Afridi told Reuters on Wednesday.

“After the World Cup I will decide whether I want to resume my Test career. This decision is based on my feeling that it is not possible for me to adjust and subsequently give 100 percent in both forms of the game.”

“The amount of cricket being played these days is too hectic for me and I felt playing both forms was affecting my performances. Doing well in the World Cup and helping my team win is my main priority now,” Afridi said.

“I have discussed this and informed my captain Inzamam-ul-Haq about this decision and he has been supportive,” Afridi said.

Inzamam said he would respect Afridi’s decision.

“I would not like to create any pressure on him to do something he does not want to do at this stage,” Inzamam said.

NOTABLY : Pakistan will play a minimum of nine Test matches and around 25 one-day internationals before the World Cup starts in March.

We Will NOT Retaliate

Blast in Karachi on eve of Eid e Milad un Nabi

Pakistani troops were on high alert Wednesday for the funeral of Sunni
Tehreek’s chief who was among 57 people killed in the country’s worst
suicide bombing in nearly two decades. Police said they were trying to
identify the bearded head of the suspected bomber who struck in Karachi
late on Tuesday, as thousands gathered in a park to celebrate the birth
of the Prophet Mohammed (PBUH).

No one claimed responsibility for the attack. “We have taken all possible
security measures for the funeral and no one will be allowed to take the
law into their own hands. It’s a great tragedy and we appeal to the
people to remain calm and peaceful,” Salahuddin Haider, spokesman for
the Sindh government said.

Related Links:
http://www.desiakhbar.com/2006/04/110406.php

Picture Gallery by DAWN
http://www.dawn.com/2006/04/11/welcome.htm

Complete Coverage by Jang:
At least 50 martyred in massive Karachi bomb explosion
http://www.jang.com.pk/thenews/apr2006-daily/12-04-2006/main/update.shtml#09

 

Tag: We Will NOT Retaliate , Technorati : We Will NOT Retaliate

The world’s most expensive cities

London is the most expensive city in the world due to the UK capital’s high cost of renting accommodation. If rents are excluded, Oslo, Copenhagen, Tokyo and Zurich are among the most costly cities in the world. In terms of living costs, Oslo remains the most expensive of the 71 cities surveyed, now followed by Copenhagen, Tokyo, Zurich and London. A basket of goods and services assembled in line with western European consumer habits (excluding rents) costs 15.5 per cent more in Oslo than it does in Zurich – over two-thirds more than the global average. If we include rents in the comparison, the differences from city to city are even more pronounced. The most expensive places to live in this respect are London, Oslo and New York. There have been some significant shifts in the top places since the 2003 edition: Copenhagen has gone from sixth to second-most expensive city, while Hong Kong has fallen from second spot and no longer ranks among the world’s most expensive cities. Our basket is still cheapest in Mumbai, Karachi, Buenos Aires and the eastern European cities of Kiev, Bucharest and Sofia. The cost in these cities is a third or less of the price in Zurich.

Rank	Cities	Index (incl rents)
1	London	122.4
2	Oslo	109.4
3	New York	105.0
4	Tokyo	104.6
5	Copenhagen	104.1
6	Hong Kong	100.6
7	Zurich	100.0
8	Paris	99.3
9	Chicago	99.1
10	Geneva	98.2
11	Dublin	97.5
12	Stockholm	95.2
13	Basel	92.8
14	Helsinki	91.8
15	Vienna	90.8
16	Lugano	90.3
17	Milan	89.5
18	Istanbul	89.4
19	Amsterdam	86.4
20	Rome	86.2
21	Nicosia	85.7
22	Frankfurt	82.6
23	Luxembourg	81.0
24	Brussels	80.9
25	Athens	79.1
26	Sydney	77.9
27	Seoul	77.7
28	Los Angeles	76.8
29	Taipei	76.6
30	Berlin	76.2
31	Lisbon	74.5
32	Toronto	74.3
33	Madrid	73.9
34	Auckland	71.7
35	Singapore	71.2
36	Barcelona	67.7
37	Montreal	66.7
38	Moscow	66.2
39	Tel Aviv	65.4
40	Miami	65.3
41	Budapest	65.3
42	Dubai	65.3
43	Ljubljana	64.6
44	Shanghai	63.5
45	Johannesburg	62.7
46	Caracas	60.8
47	Manama	58.2
48	Warsaw	55.5
49	Lagos	55.3
50	Jakarta	55.0
51	Mexico City	54.9
52	Tallinn	52.7
53	São Paulo	51.8
54	Bratislava	49.9
55	Vilnius	48.2
56	Nairobi	47.6
57	Rio de Janeiro	46.0
58	Santiago de Chile	45.8
59	Prague	45.2
60	Bangkok	41.9
61	Bogotá	38.8
62	Riga	37.7
63	Manila	37.5
64	Kuala Lumpur	36.5
65	Sofia	36.4
66	Lima	32.7
67	Kiev	32.7
68	Bucharest	32.2
69	Karachi	29.1
70	Buenos Aires	27.8
71	Mumbai	27.8

 

Impact of Job change

A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimeters from a shop window.
 
For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said: “Look mate, don’t ever do that again. You scared  me!”.
 
The passenger apologized and said, “I didn’t realize that a little tap would scare you so much.”
 
The driver replied, “Sorry, it’s not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver – I’ve been driving a van carrying dead Bodies for the last 25 years…………

The Perfect Husband…

Several men are in the changing room of a golf club.
A mobile phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands free
speaker-function and began to talk.

Everyone else in the room stops to listen.

MAN: “Hello”

WOMAN: “Darling, it’s me. Are you at the club?”

MAN: “Yes”

WOMAN: “I am at the shopping centre and found this beautiful leather coat.
It’s only $ 1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?”

MAN: “Sure,..go ahead if you like it that much.”

WOMAN: “I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new 2005
models. I saw one I really liked.”

MAN: “How much?”

WOMAN: ” $ 70,000″

MAN: “OK, but for that price I want it with all the options.”

WOMAN: “Great! Oh, and one more thing … The house I wanted last
year is back on the market. They’re asking $ 950,000″

MAN: “Well, then go ahead and give them an offer of 900,000.
They will probably take it. If not, we can go the extra 50 thousand.
It really is a pretty good price.”

WOMAN: “OK. I’ll see you later! I love you so much!!”

MAN: “Bye! I love you, too.”

The man hangs up. The other men in the changing room are staring at
him in astonishment, mouths agape…..

He smiles and asks:

“Anyone know who this phone belongs to”

Presence of Mind

In an IIM interview
PANEL-Shall i ask u one tough question or 10 easy questions?
CANDIDATE-ask me one tough question sir
PANEL-ok which comes first.The day or the night?
CANDIDATEc-the day sir.
PANEL-how do u say that?
CANDIDATE-Sir, u promised me that you wont ask me the second toughest question.
the guy was selected…..

Translation Problem

A few years ago, Prime Minister Mori was given some
Basic English conversation training before he visits
Washington and meets president Bill Clinton.

The instructor told Mori “Prime Minister, when you
shake hand with President Clinton, please say ‘how are
you’. Then Mr Clinton should say, “I am fine, and
you?” Now you should say ‘me too’. Afterwards we,
translators,will do all the work for you.”
It looks quite simple, but the truth is…. When Mori
met Clinton, he mistakenly said “Who Are You?”.

Mr Clinton was a bit shocked but still managed to
react with humour “Well, I am Hilary’s husband, ha
ha….” Then Mori replied confidently “Me too, ha ha
ha.”

Then there was a long silence in the meeting room.

Jokes

The Boss
A guy phones up his Boss, but gets the bosses’ wife instead:
“I’m afraid he died last week.” she explains.
The next day the man calls again and asks for the boss.
“I told you” the wife replies, “he died last week.”
The next day he calls again and once more asks to speak to his
boss. By this time the wife is getting upset and shouts:
“I’VE ALREADY TOLD YOU TWICE, MY HUSBAND, YOUR BOSS, DIED LAST WEEK! WHY DO
YOU KEEP CALLING?”

“Coz . . .” he replied laughing, “I just love hearing it. . . .”

The Burnt Ears
One day a man was going on the street. He met a man who asked him what had
happened to his ears as both ears covered with bandages.

He said: “I was ironing my clothes when the phone bell rang. Instead of
picking up the phone, i pick up the iron, so i burnt my ear.”

The man asked “So what happened to your other ear?”

He said “That same stupid guy called again”